"Man, I'm pregnant!" said Ratih while showing the two-striped test pack and hanging spoiled on the shoulder - OUR MIDWIFE

"Man, I'm pregnant!" said Ratih while showing the two-striped test pack and hanging spoiled on the shoulder. 

I gasped with widened eyes to hear the news. Between happiness and fear. I was happy because I really wanted to have children, but I was afraid that Andarini, my wife, would find out that I had secretly had an illicit relationship with Ratih. 

"Why don't you just stay quiet, Mas? Not happy to hear about my pregnancy?" Ratih pursed her spoiled lips. 

"I-I'm really happy, Ra. It's just..." Hanging the sentence, confused what to say. 

"Just what?" He tightened his grip even more. 

Ratih is so aggressive. The first time I met him, I dared to hug him, especially after what happened that night. He was getting bolder with me, and often asked me to get married, but I refused because it was enough for me to make a fatal mistake that violated religious norms. 

I also don't know why after eating Mother's cooking that night, my body suddenly felt hot and the desire to do it was overwhelming and I couldn't stand it. Until finally when morning greeted, I woke up without a single thread, also both in the room with Ratih, who incidentally was not my halal partner. 

"Why are you daydreaming?" I was shocked when the woman who claimed to be pregnant with my child shook this shoulder roughly. 

"No, really. What should I do now, Ra? You are pregnant with my child, while I still have a wife and she can't possibly want to share a husband with you!" Stroking the back of Ratih's hand, feeling sorry if she got pregnant without a husband. 

After all, the child in her womb is also my flesh and blood. 

Ah, it turns out that my suspicions were correct all along, that Andarini was the infertile one, not me. It's just that because he's rich and has everything, I'm not going to let him go. I still love my wife very much, because after all, she is the only woman who wants to accept herself as she is, regardless of status and never even demands anything from me. 'It's nice to have a beautiful wife, rich, not adventurous, kind too. 

Yes, even though he is barren. 

"You see, Hakam. Ratih is now pregnant with your child. Immediately marry him and divorce Rini!" Mom ordered while slowly sinking her buttocks on the expensive sofa that I bought using my wife's money. 

How can I divorce Rini? who will give us food and wealth if he is divorced. No. I have to play pretty. I want to have Rini and Ratih at the same time. 

"I can't divorce Rini, Mom!" Lean back on the seat support made of teak wood. 

"Why are you defending a parasitic woman like her. Mother doesn't want your wealth to be controlled by that barren woman!"

If only Mother knew that the rich was her son-in-law, surely Mother would not be able to say this. 

Darling. I've already admitted that all of Rini's wealth is mine. They could lose their prestige if they find out that Hakam Zulfikar, who has always been proud of, is actually just a cool man who supports his wife. 

"If you are asked to discuss Rini's problem, you will definitely shut up. What is it that you are proud of from a woman like her? What knowledge did you use to make you fall to your knees to her?!"

'Rini's wealth is what keeps me going, Mother.' I answered silently. 

"Anyway, Mas must marry me immediately, otherwise I will not hesitate to abort this baby!" Ratih threatened while crying. 

"Okay, Mas will marry you secretly without Rini's knowledge. But there's no party, Ra. Mas doesn't want Rini to find out and get angry!"

"I want to marry siri but have to throw a lavish party. What do people say if I get married but no party?"

Good grief! In stark contrast to the nature of Ratih and Andarini. Rini, who incidentally comes from a well-to-do family, has never been adventurous, let alone a lot of style. Very different from Ratih who always wants to appear like a rich person even though she is from the lower class. If it weren't for the child I couldn't get from Rini, I would really refuse to marry and live with her. 

"But, Ra. Mas..."

"No buts. Anyway, I want a lavish party in the building. This is your future child's request, you know!" he cut off sulking while stroking his stomach. 

"That's true, Kam. If someone's request is pregnant, you can't refuse it. Later your child will drool. Besides, how much is the most used up, Kam. Never mind, just comply. Don't be rejected. Don't be stingy with your future wife and future children. Ratih is pregnant, so you have to spoil her!" Mother defended me. 

I took a deep breath then exhaled slowly. Confused because currently have no money at all. Not to mention the hundreds of millions for building rent and paying for other things, I don't even have one for food if my wife doesn't support me. It felt so embarrassing to ask Rini for money to get married. 

Ah, Ratih, it just makes my head spin! 

***

At nine in the evening I went home because usually Andarini was home at this time. I don't want him to get suspicious, let alone catch up to my mother's house. There could be a big war if he finds out that I have betrayed his love, sharing a body with another woman until that woman contains my seed. 

After a few minutes of driving through the city's traffic jams, we quickly pulled over the car in front of the house and found that Andarini was already home. 

The long-haired woman immediately greeted my arrival with a warm smile, shook this hand and then kissed her back solemnly. It doesn't feel like it to double the love of a woman as good as her. 

But, I also can't leave Ratih. She is pregnant with my child, the seed of love that Rini can't give to me. 

"What are you doing, Mas? Are there any problems?" asked Rini while staring deeply at my black bead. 

I confuse what I must answer. Should I lie and ask for some money to get married to Ratih? 

There seems to be no other way. Forced to lie to him so he could marry the woman I had become pregnant with. 

"Honey. Can you borrow five hundred million for business capital or not?" With great difficulty getting the words out. 

Rini seemed to take a deep breath. He then turned to me, gently caressing this cheek, smiling spoiled. 

"My money has just been used to open a new branch, Mas. But I have jewelry that, if sold, costs more than the money you need. What kind of business do you want to open?"

Cough!! 

Choking on his own spit hearing questions from his wife. 

"Emanu, a friend asked me to join the business. I'm tired of being an employee. I want to have my own business so I can make your life happy, not to keep bothering you if you have a large income. It's not as cool as it is now. I'm ashamed of you, Rin !"

"Oh my God, Mas. It doesn't matter to me even if you have minimal income, the important thing is that you love me."

I stared at her pretty face. Guilt suddenly seeped into my heart, for having dared to betray Rini's love that was so sincere. Even if you think about it, the difference between Ratih and Rini is like heaven and earth. Rini is so stunningly beautiful with pure white skin and round, beautiful eyes, while Ratih, ah, just so much different. 

But what else can I do. She is beautiful but barren. While Ratih is mediocre but can give me offspring. Later after marriage I can again ask for some money to make up my new wife's face. 

It's also nice to have two wives. Can take turns in love if one of them is in trouble and can't serve. 

Uh, it's nice to imagine being flanked by two women who both can complete my life. It's not useless to have a handsome face even though your pocket is mediocre. 

***

After selling the jewelery given by Rini, I immediately prepared for my wedding with Ratih. Comply with all his requests, afraid that my child will drool if it is not granted. 

However, at the wedding which was held so big suddenly Rini came crashing down, destroying my event and even now she chose to part with me. 

Unlucky! Can starve and can not please the family if you part with him. I will try to protect Rini, for the money she always gives, as well as the child in Ratih's womb. I don't want to lose everything. 

***

Without realizing it, I haven't seen my wife for a week. He always avoids me, even though I really need money to pay the car installment. Because all my salary has been given to Mother and Ratih, and now I only have fifty thousand in my pocket. How can you pay the car installments if you don't ask Andarini. 

[Rin, transfer ten million now.] I sent a message to Rini but never got a reply. Even though in the corner of the screen I see that he is currently online. 

Basic disobedient wife. Husband needs money, instead of reading the message immediately, he ignores it. He's already getting cocky! 

"Mas, aku hamil!" ucap Ratih seraya menunjukkan test pack bergaris dua dan bergelayut manja di pundak.

Aku terkesiap dengan bola mata membulat sempurna mendengar kabar tersebut. Antara bahagia sekaligus takut. Bahagia karena aku memang benar-benar ingin memiliki keturunan, tetapi takut jika sampai Andarini istriku tahu kalau aku diam-diam pernah melakukan hubungan terlarang dengan Ratih.

"Kok kamu diem aja, Mas? Nggak seneng ya, denger kabar kehamilan aku?" Ratih memonyongkan bibir manja.

"Se-seneng kok, Ra. Hanya saja..." Menggantung kalimat, bingung harus berkata apa.

"Hanya saja apa?" Dia semakin mempererat pelukannya.

Ratih memang begitu agresif. Pertama kenal saja sudah berani peluk-peluk, apalagi setelah kejadian malam itu. Dia semakin berani kepadaku, bahkan sering mengajakku ngamar, namun aku menolak karena cukup sekali saja aku melakukan kesalahan fatal yang melanggar norma agama. 

Aku juga tidak tahu kenapa setelah makan masakan Ibu malam itu, tiba-tiba badanku terasa panas dan hasrat ingin melakukan itu menggebu-gebu tanpa bisa aku tahan. Hingga akhirnya ketika pagi menyapa, aku bangun dalam keadaan tanpa sehelai benang pun, juga berdua di dalam kamar bersama Ratih yang notabene bukan pasangan halalku.

"Kok malah melamun?" Aku terperanjat kaget ketika wanita yang mengaku sedang mengandung anakku itu mengguncang kasar bahu ini.

"Enggak, kok. Sekarang aku harus bagaimana, Ra? Kamu hamil anakku, sementara aku masih punya istri dan dia tidak mungkin mau berbagi suami dengan kamu!" Mengelus punggung tangan Ratih, merasa kasihan jika dia sampai hamil tanpa seorang suami.

Lagian, anak dalam kandungannya itu juga 'kan darah dagingku.

Ah, ternyata benar dugaanku selama ini, kalau Andarini lah yang mandul, bukan aku. Hanya saja karena dia kaya raya dan memiliki segalanya, aku tidak akan melepas dia begitu saja. Aku masih sangat mencintai istriku itu, karena biar bagaimanapun, dia satu-satunya perempuan yang mau menerima diri ini apa adanya, tanpa memandang status bahkan tidak pernah menuntut apa-apa dariku. 'Kan seneng punya istri cantik, kaya, nggak neko-neko, baik pula. 

Ya, meskipun dia mandul.

"Kamu lihat, Hakam. Ratih sekarang sedang mengandung anak kamu. Segera nikahi dia dan ceraikan Rini!" perintah Ibu seraya mengenyakkan bokong perlahan di sofa mahal yang aku beli menggunakan uang istri.

Bagaimana bisa aku menceraikan Rini? siapa yang akan memberi kita makan dan kekayaan jika dia aku talak. Tidak. Aku harus main cantik. Aku ingin memiliki Rini juga Ratih sekaligus.

"Aku tidak mungkin menceraikan Rini, Bu!" Menyandarkan punggung di penopang kursi yang terbuat dari kayu jati.

"Untuk apa dipertahankan wanita parasit seperti dia. Ibu nggak sudi kekayaan kamu dikuasai sama perempuan mandul itu!"

Andai saja Ibu tahu bahwa yang kaya adalah menantunya, pasti Ibu tidak akan bisa berkata seperti ini. 

Sayang. Aku sudah terlanjur mengaku kalau semua kekayaan Rini adalah milikku. Bisa turun pamor kalau mereka sampai tahu ternyata Hakam Zulfikar yang selalu dibanggakan sebenarnya hanya lelaki kere yang menopang hidup kepada istrinya.

"Kamu itu kalau diajak membahas masalah Rini pasti diem. Memangnya apa sih, yang kamu banggakan dari perempuan seperti dia? Dipelet pake ilmu apa sampai kamu begitu bertekuk lutut kepadanya?!" 

'Harta Rini yang membuat aku bertahan, Ibu.' Aku menjawab dalam hati.

"Pokoknya Mas harus segera menikahi aku, kalau tidak, aku tidak akan segan-segan menggugurkan bayi ini!" ancam Ratih sambil menangis.

"Oke, Mas akan menikahi kamu secara siri tanpa sepengetahuan Rini. Tapi tidak ada pesta ya, Ra. Mas nggak mau Rini sampai tahu dan ngamuk!"

"Aku mau menikah siri tapi harus mengadakan pesta yang mewah. Apa kata orang-orang kalau aku menikah tapi tidak diadakan pesta?" 

Astaga! Berbanding terbalik sekali sifat Ratih dengan Andarini. Rini yang notabene dari keluarga berada, tidak pernah neko-neko apalagi banyak gaya. Berbeda sekali dengan Ratih yang selalu ingin tampil seperti orang kaya padahal dia dari kalangan bawah. Kalau bukan karena anak yang tidak bisa aku dapat dari Rini, ogah banget nikah dan hidup bersama dia.

"Tapi, Ra. Mas..."

"Nggak ada tapi-tapian. Pokoknya aku mau pesta yang mewah di gedung. Ini permintaan calon anak kamu, lho!" potongnya merajuk sambil mengelus-elus perut.

"Bener tuh, Kam. Kalau permintaan orang sedang hamil itu tidak bisa ditolak. Nanti anak kamu ngileran. Lagian paling habis berapa sih, Kam. Sudahlah, turuti saja. Jangan sampai ditolak. Jangan pelit sama calon istri dan calon anak. Ratih itu lagi hamil, jadi harus kamu manjain!" bela Ibu membuatku mati kutu.

Aku mengambil napas dalam-dalam lalu mengembuskannya perlahan. Bingung sebab saat ini sedang tidak memiliki uang sama sekali. Jangankan ratusan juta untuk sewa gedung juga membayar lain-lainnya, buat makan saja kalau tidak disokong oleh istri aku tidak punya. Rasanya malu sekali jika meminta uang kepada Rini untuk modal nikah.

Ah, Ratih, bikin kepala aku pusing saja!

***

Pukul sembilan malam aku pulang ke rumah karena biasanya Andarini sudah pulang di jam-jam seperti ini. Tidak mau dia sampai curiga apalagi sampai menyusul ke rumah Ibu. Bisa ada perang besar jika dia sampai tahu aku telah mengkhianati cintanya, berbagi raga dengan perempuan lain hingga wanita itu mengandung benihku.

Setelah beberapa menit menembus kemacetan kota, gegas menepikan mobil di depan rumah dan ternyata Andarini sudah pulang.

Wanita berambut panjang itu segera menyambut dengan senyum hangat kedatanganku, menyalami tangan ini lalu mencium bagian punggungnya dengan khidmat. Rasanya tidak tega jika sampai menduakan cinta perempuan sebaik dia.

Tapi, aku juga tidak bisa meninggalkan Ratih. Dia sedang mengandung anakku, benih cinta yang tidak bisa Rini berikan kepada diriku.

"Kamu kenapa, Mas? Lagi ada masalah?" tanya Rini seraya menatap dalam-dalam manik hitamku.

Aku bingung harus menjawab apa. Haruskah berbohong dan meminta sejumlah uang untuk modal menikah dengan Ratih?

Sepertinya memang tidak ada jalan lain. Terpaksa harus membohongi dia supaya bisa menikahi wanita yang telah aku hamili.

"Sayang. Mas boleh nggak pinjam uang lima ratus juta untuk modal usaha?" Dengan susah payah mengeluarkan kata-kata tersebut.

Rini terlihat menghela napas berat. Dia lalu menoleh ke arahku, mengusap lembut pipi ini sambil tersenyum manja.

"Uang aku baru dipake buat buka cabang baru, Mas. Tapi aku punya perhiasan yang jika dijual harganya melebihi uang yang kamu butuhkan. Memangnya kamu mau buka usaha apa?"

Uhuk!!

Tersedak ludah sendiri mendengar pertanyaan dari istri.

"Em...anu, teman ngajakin join bisnis. Mas bosen jadi karyawan. Pengen punya usaha sendiri supaya bisa membahagiakan hidup kamu, tidak terus menerus merepotkan kamu jika Mas memiliki penghasilan yang besar. Tidak kere seperti sekarang. Mas malu sama kamu, Rin!"

"Ya Allah, Mas. Aku itu nggak masalah walaupun kamu berpenghasilan minim, yang penting kamu sayang sama aku." 

Aku menatap lamat-lamat wajah cantiknya. Rasa bersalah tiba-tiba menelusup di dalam sanubari, karena telah berani mengkhianati cinta Rini yang begitu tulus. Padahal jika dipikir-pikir perbedaan antara Ratih dan Rini itu bagaikan langit dan bumi. Rini begitu cantik memesona dengan kulit putih bersih serta mata bulat indah, sedangkan Ratih, ah, pokoknya jauh sekali perbedaannya.

Tapi mau bagaimana lagi. Dia cantik tapi mandul. Sedangkan Ratih biasa-biasa saja tapi bisa memberikan aku keturunan. Nanti setelah nikah aku bisa kembali meminta sejumlah uang untuk mempermak wajah istri baruku itu.

Lagian enak juga punya istri dua. Bisa menggilir cinta jika salah satu dari mereka sedang halangan serta tidak bisa melayani. 

Uh, senangnya membayangkan diapit oleh dua orang wanita yang sama-sama bisa melengkapi hidupku. Nggak sia-sia mempunyai wajah tampan walaupun kantong pas-pasan.

***

Setelah menjual perhiasan yang diberikan oleh Rini aku segera mempersiapkan pernikahanku dengan Ratih. Menuruti segala permintaannya, takut anakku ngileran jika tidak dikabulkan.

Namun, diacara pernikahan yang dihelat begitu besar tiba-tiba Rini datang melabrak, menghancurkan acaraku dan bahkan saat ini dia memilih berpisah denganku.

Sial! Bisa kelaparan dan tidak bisa menyenangkan hati keluarga jika sampai berpisah dengan dia. Aku akan berusaha mempertahankan Rini, demi uang yang selalu dia berikan, juga anak yang ada di dalam kandungan Ratih. Aku tidak mau kehilangan semuanya.

***

Tanpa terasa sepekan sudah aku tidak bertemu dengan istri. Dia selalu menghindari diriku, padahal aku begitu membutuhkan uang untuk membayar angsuran mobil. Sebab seluruh gajiku sudah diberikan kepada Ibu serta Ratih, dan sekarang aku hanya memegang uang sebesar lima puluh ribu saja. Bagaimana caranya bisa membayar cicilan mobil kalau tidak meminta kepada Andarini.

[Rin, transfer duit sepuluh juta sekarang.] Kukirim pesan kepada Rini walaupun tidak pernah dibalas. Padahal di pojokan layar aku lihat kalau saat ini dia sedang online.

Dasar istri durhaka. Suami butuh uang bukannya segera dibaca pesannya malah diabaikan. Sudah mulai sombong rupanya dia!